I know no amount of tears will solve the problem. But i juz cant help. It flows down on its own that I don't seem to be able to control it. It seems like on its own.

I'm feeling really lousy. Why did I realise my mistake so late. I will neither forget the matter nor forgive myself for the rest of my life. Juz like how I remember the first sin I committed.

I wonder..if I were to cry till I turn blind, will anyone pity me? Or I should say care.
I know there will be but those are people who don't know the ugly truth or they really could understand how I feel. Argh! I told myself countless time that...'com'on you don't deserve any sympathy! U brought it upon yourself! So stop thinking there will be people who knows what u're thinking! Com'on wake up your idea!'

I really don't wanna see him being hurt again..I know he will never forget this as well..but is me stayin with him the best decision? Or selfish decision?
I cant bring myself to leave him. I really cant. Juz cant!
All i wish now is..do my every part to make him stand back again. I want him to recover and be confident and happy.

T might sound so nice and good here people..but please don't be misleaded by this.
I am a real selfish bitch. Heartless. Inconsiderate.
People like me deserve to be remembered with bad names and juz die. So i really don't wish for any forgiveness or empathy.

I will prove what i gotta prove. And probably....silly thoughts again! Ha!
Ok..i told myself this...'no silly thoughts! I gotta be filial! I cant throw them on their own..i won't!'

So ya..I will prove that a person will not get pin down by the mistakes they make. I will be a better person unless I had lost the person I loved. Or else, i'll prove that a leopard will change it's spots! Cause i'm a human.
Even criminals get second chance...yellow ribbon...